On aging

Here is the announcement:  I am not aging gracefully.  Those are the kindest words I can choose.

A while back, I was in my car with the radio on.  I almost always car dance--especially at stoplights--so I started to get my groove on when I felt what I thought was a bug on my leg.  I freaked out and looked down.  Nothing there.  I moved my leg again and saw that it was flab bouncing around on the top of my leg.  Flab?!  Right then I sorta wished it had been some horrifying, dangerous, disgusting insect.  Anything but the dreaded jiggle!

I have a lot of wrinkles on my face (thanks to my sun goddess ways in my 20s and 30s), and they make me look older than I am, in my opinion.  They make me look mad when I'm not, and people often misinterpret me because of it.  I also have a secret extra wrinkle on the left side of my face because I sleep on that side.  I have the silk pillowcase, but it can only help so much.  Moisturizer, yes.  Decrease in wrinkles, no. 

There are older women who look gorgeous with gray hair.  I'm not one of them.  My roots start showing at about 3 weeks.  I have to go 4 weeks in between appts. though, because I get paid biweekly.  That gives me anywhere from 4-8 days with roots most everyone can see because there are few people who are my height.  If my schedule has to change and I have to go 5 or 6 weeks between salon trips, it's more noticeable and I look haggard from the wrinkles anyway.  Ouch!

Arthritis runs in my family and I'm showing signs of it in my hands.  I can't straighten out two of my fingers and I can feel how the tiny bones are curved.  Other joints in my body bother me now and again. It makes me feel old even though I know perfectly well that arthritis is not just a disease for the elderly.

Ok, so I've written a few paragraphs lamenting the fact that my body is doing what it was going to do anyway, and it's not like I don't have friends and colleagues my age who are also in the process.  The bottom line is...

I am vain.

It shouldn't matter, and I would like to think it matters more to me than anyone else, but I'm vain.  I wish I wasn't.

I used to be prettier and more physically fit. 

I used to have perky bewbies too!!!  (lol)

I wish I had the body I had at 29 that I didn't like when I was 29.

I know women who are older than I am but who look better than I do.  It is hard not to be a little jealous when you find out someone is older than you but they look wayyyyy younger.


I'm far from a pity party about this, though.  I'm not sad about anything (well, except maybe my public decree of vanity) because right now it's where I am.   I know there are things I can control. So I'm going to be working on those things and trying to discern the difference between my self image and my body image. (Sorry to hijack Dr. Phil!)

xo xo xo

29 august 2011

47th birthday images

Sugar coma on a plate a/k/a

Ice cream cake from Guzmans and Granny Old

 

B'day Balloon

Roses from my garden

without flash for color comparison

 

From Nana & Papa and Garrisons :)

White light :)

Good for contemplating, creating, and connecting.  There are many things in this picture that connect me to my family and friends today and every day.  I had a wonderful birthday weekend.

xo xo xo

Orchid growin'

Remember when I got the yellow orchid at Bok Tower Gardens?  It came with a special instruction sheet, which worried me because somtimes I don't hold up my end of said instructions.  ;-)  Ahem.

I asked a lady at work whose aunt used to grow all kinds of orchids for tips.  She told me her aunt always kept them outside, they were fairly low maintenance, and that they took a really long time to bloom.

I think mine must be happy right where she is, because not only does she have brand new shoots off the roots, there are two large buds that are going to open soon.  The whole stem has new buds coming out.

 

Never mind

I had a very funny blog post written about the perils of being a list maker.  And guess what?  Now I can't find that damn list.

Old age?  Blackout?  Tokyo ate it?

I'll be danged if I'm going to try to recreate it because I know it won't be as funny as the one I already wrote.  Rest assured when I find it - and I will - that I will revisit this subject.

Earthquake in Virginia

Hope everyone I know and love in the states that were affected by the earthquake are safe & sound.

The weather and Mother Nature just keep getting weirder and weirder.

Tomorrow:  a glimpse into the life of a list maker. 

Third and Fifth

The fifth grader and the third grader got it done for the first day of school.  They always stay up too late the night before and have trouble waking up (tree meets apples).  We got everything done somehow, ran out the door and JS reminded me that I need to take pictures!  I had the camera out already....

Picture of them last year on first day of school

This year's pictures on 22 August 2011

Goober alert:  I usually loved the first day of school!  However, it doesn't seem like JS or CG got the goober gene. 

xo xo xo

Starbuck Springs

Suzy, my friend fromwork, invited us to a party at the private property of a friend of hers.  We couldn't have planned a more fun day for the last Saturday of summer.  :)  The pictures don't do it justice!  Who wouldn't love getting up in the morning with this view of the woods?

Check this out!  It was a huge tree stump and

the staghorns went all the way around it

When I forced them to pose ;-)

Yeah, buh-bye--

This is when he yelled, "Mom, this is way better than playing the DS!"

Caroline floats the girl way

Sis and Bro

Yo!

Remember a long time ago when I used to blog but then I stopped?  I'll fib and say I was on hiatus, and now I am back!  It occurred to me that I seemed to be able to blog more regularly when I was in school and had a more hectic schedule.  Strange.

Good photos tomorrow.  xo xo

Idle

You might have noticed I haven't been blogging very much ;)

I haven't been taking a lot of pictures lately, so that limits the posting.

So far this week:

Yesterday CG said she didn't feel good, and she had a low-grade fever and stuffy nose.  I thought she might be getting a cold, so I let her stay home.  When I got home at lunch to check on her, she had shorts on with a purple shirt AND socks.  Maybe it's just me, but I don't care about fashion when I'm sick.  Anyway, we are happy about her speedy recovery.

Today JS played his DSi-XL (Nintendo) and got to the top of a mountain that he's been trying to conquer for a while.  After he did it, he came running out to tell his sister and me, and we gave him some high fives.  CG went "woohoo!" and decided she'd watch him play instead of watching iCarly. I don't even need to know what the mountain thing is--I just love that he was so happy about the game!!